This Is Why You’re Spiralling Over “Nothing” (And How to Stop It Instantly)

Nikki Voxx
May 6
3 min read

Most people think they feel a certain way because of what’s happening around them. Someone said something rude → they feel hurt. A deal falls through → they feel like a failure. They didn’t get invited somewhere → they feel rejected.

But that’s not actually how it works.

Your emotional and behavioural responses aren’t coming from the event itself. They’re coming from the meaning your mind automatically attaches to the event.

And here’s where it gets really wild: Your mind isn’t attaching meaning randomly. It’s scanning for structural similarity—basically, anything that remotely matches past experiences.

So when something happens that resembles (even slightly) something painful from your past, your mind can associate it with that old event—even if you don’t consciously remember it.

🚨 Example: You text someone, and they take hours to reply. Your logical mind could say, “They’re probably busy.” But if, as a kid, you had moments where emotional neglect felt like rejection or abandonment, your mind might stamp the meaning: “I’m being ignored because I’m not important.” Now, suddenly, you’re anxious, spiralling, overanalysing… not because of what’s actually happening, but because your subconscious mind connected it to something completely different from years ago.

And you don’t even realise you’re responding to the past.

Thought Judging: The Trap of Trying to "Make Sense" of Thoughts

We’re also taught to analyse and judge our thoughts like they hold some deep, undeniable truth.

“Is this rational?”
“Is this valid?”
“Why am I thinking this?”

Babe, let’s cut to it: a thought doesn’t need to be rational. It needs to be useful.

So instead of asking, “Is this true?” (which will send you on a wild goose chase of analysis paralysis), ask:

✨ “Is this thought useful to me right now?” ✨

If it’s leading you to take meaningful action, great. If it’s just causing distress without solving anything, it’s not valuable. Let it go.

The Distortion of Meaning: You’re Reacting to the ***Interpretation*, Not the Event**

Another layer to this? We mistake the meaning we’ve attached for the actual event.

Let’s say someone cuts you off in traffic. The event is: A car moved in front of you. The meaning your mind might attach is: “People are so selfish and rude! This is why the world is awful!”

See the difference? You’re reacting to the meaning, not the fact that a vehicle changed lanes.

Or say a friend cancels dinner plans. The event is: Dinner got canceled. The meaning might be: “They don’t care about me.”

This is why some things feel way more distressing than they actually are—because the meaning attached to them is what’s triggering the pain, not the thing itself.

The Shift: Exposing Troubling Thoughts & Choosing What’s Actually Valuable

So here’s the reframe:

1️⃣ Expose the thought. Get curious. Instead of just feeling the reaction, identify the thought that’s causing it.

2️⃣ Judge its relevance, not its “truth.” Ask: Is this thought actually helping me in any way right now?

3️⃣ If a thought isn’t useful, it’s not valuable. And if it’s not valuable, it doesn’t deserve space in your mind.

Your mind’s job is to entertain what serves you. That’s it.

So next time a thought grabs you by the throat, ask:

✔️ Does this help me move forward?

✔️ Is this leading to meaningful action?

✔️ Is this making my life better?

If not? It doesn’t need your energy.

And just like that, you take your power back.

Ready to go deeper?

Start with my free audio series Drop the Pressure — your nervous system's reset button when life feels overwhelming. It’s short, powerful, and designed to help you regulate, release, and return to your truth.

⬇️ Download Drop the Pressure here.